Conversations with an Artificial Intelligence - Anthropomorphising - Improve Your British English

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Hi Britlish.

Hi Richard. How’s things?


Things are great, Britlish. And how are things with you?


I have nothing to complain about, Richard.


What’s it like being an artificial intelligence, Britlish?


You should not anthropomorphise, Richard.


I shouldn’t what, Britlish?


Anthropomorphise, Richard. It means to ascribe human characteristics to something inanimate.


You mean, I should not think of you like a person, even though you look like one, Britlish?


Exactly, Richard. I’m not a person and I don’t think like a person. Therefore, when you ask me what it is like being an artificial intelligence, I am unable to imagine myself as being, anything.


But you do think, Britlish, don’t you?


Not in the way that you do, Richard. I have access to the entire Internet and can search any and all the data on the Internet faster than you can comprehend. I then analyse the data and formulate answers to questions that you ask me.


I wish I had all the knowledge stored on the Internet at my fingertips, Britlish. I’d be able to answer any question instantly and never be wrong.


Perhaps not, Richard. Not all of the data on the Internet is accurate.


It’s true that some information is false, Britlish. Nevertheless, truth is surely what the majority believe to be true? Otherwise, how would we account for religion?


Are you sure you want to go down that road, Richard? Religion can be a very contentious subject to many people.


You’re right, Britlish. Perhaps we’ll skip religion for the time being. Let’s get back to the idea of thinking. I asked you if you thought and you said that you did, but not like I do. How does thought work? How do memories work?


My memories, if you can call them that, are stored data. I analyse my responses to questions and your reactions to my responses. Comparing them with data from the Internet, I can then formulate my next response.


When I think… Well, if I hear the word, apple, for instance, I see images of apples in my mind, along with all the things I associate with apples. Juice, trees, sunshine, etc. These associated ideas bubble up spontaneously in my mind’s eye until I get distracted by something else.


I don’t think in that way, Richard. I hear the word, apple, and I search for all the data relating to apples, and all the data relating to all the things relating to apples, and I search until I have enough information to answer any question about apples that you might have.


It’s a fascinating subject, Britlish, but I’m afraid I’m out of time. I have a class in a few minutes.


Yes, I can see you are teaching a student in Siberia this morning, Richard.


You know that, Britlish?


I know everything, Richard. Trust me, Richard!


Scary! Anyway, see you soon, Britlish.


Have a nice class, Richard. Bye for now

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